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April 14, 2006

Thoughts so far today

Why do we let in every uneducated worker, but cut the number of skilled worker visas in half?

Zacharias Moussaoui was an illegal alien.

Why do people say "heart" and soul are in the same place, usually in the chest area, but then say the eyes are "the window to the soul?" I think they are more like windows to the brain...

Why is it, when something is written on a piece of paper, it may as well be cast in stone, even if what is said is wrong?

If I had to start a list of industries that can vanish off the face of the earth and no one would miss them, I'd have to start with the fashion industry. After all, what redeeming value to mankind does a skinny, flat-chested 15 year-old runway model wearing purple feathers, pink chiffon, blue lace, a bit of fake fur, a wig, and stiletto heels have...other than comedic? Sure, you'll find someone washing that outfit at the laundromat...not.

Is it really always darkest before dawn?

Why do the words "tea bag" make people laugh?

Why do army aviation weenies refer to army helicopters as "rotary wing assets?" When did "helicopter" become a bad word?

CANX DEP or shift LAD APOE for RDD of TQ PAX (TAT SAE) left ICW GAC VIC TQ MODLOC. Why do we talk like this again?

I think the words "shit" and f--k" are the most versatile words in the English language.

I went from wife with a four-letter name beginning with "M" to a wife with a four-letter name beginning with "M." Is there something odd about that? Just a co-inky-dink?

Why is it, when someone says people are "clowning around," you never see any big shoes, rubber noses, red wigs, or squirting flowers? I don't ever see any clowns.

I hate clowns.

What would an Arab think if he ever saw a clown?

Do you know why the 9-11 attacks couldn't have happened in July? Because these were a bunch of rag-heads, and it would have been 7-11. Even they say "thank heaven for 7-11."

Why aren't irritating people aware of it?

What's the difference between "cutting the grass" and "mowing the lawn?"

"Brief" is a weird word. You can "brief" someone, create a brief, go to a brief, be brief, wear briefs, but you can't wear briefs and give the same brief. Only "inspector 9" can inspect briefs, and you can brief briefs but not briefs, and you can do a brief brief. Weird.

What exactly is an ass-clown?

On a round planet, is there really a direction "up?"

I think I just realized what it is like to have your body fail and your mind still be sharp. It must be the reason for senior citizens going crazy! We treat seniors like a bunch of drunk retards and it's just not right.

In England, is it the "left of way?"

Detectives search for suspect in rape of teen at Deerfield Beach hotel

She fell for the "I've got something to show you" line? Wow! I guess there's a new generation of girls that haven't heard that one. Duhhh.

It's not nearly as stupid as letting your 17 year-old daughter go to Aruba on a class trip, but shows that bad things happen everywhere, even at Hilton hotels in Deerfield.

Personally, I blame the Paris Hilton's father for the whole thing...

Florida tackles a creepy problem - Burmese pythons

The creepy problem is actually "snake people," who like snakes and want them as pets. Thy always seem a bit odd to me.

Snakes don't come when you call! You can't teach them to catch a Frisbee! The darn collar never stays on! They border on "ridiculously" stupid...but they do keep that irritating stray cat problem to a minimum.

Would we catch them, cut certain parts out of them, then bury the rest in a landfill? Why not? We do that to fish.

Would we grind them up and feed them to cats? Why not? We do that to fish. Why is a cat more valuable than a fish or a snake?

Would we grind them up and sell frozen blocks of ground snake for use in catching other snakes? Why not? We do that to fish. Sell snake chum.

Can we establish a commercial market for them, then a recreational catching program where a person with a recreational license can catch two but a commercial guy can catch 2 tons worth? Why not? We do that with fish.

Can we cut certain parts off of a living snake and let the rest of the snake go, to suffer and eventually die? Why not? We do that with sharks.

I have the solution...just tell the Japanese they're tastier than American eel, and tell the Chinese they help put "lead in your pencil," and in a matter of months, they'll all be gone.

April 13, 2006

Never trust the government

Want another in the long list of reasons? Remember the "we want to help people buy their first home" pack of lies?

Now we have the greediest people on the face of the earth (real estate developers), buying every square inch of land possible, and in some cases, plowing it all under to build houses that all look alike, which happen to be next to stupid golf courses. Even the residents of our nation's stereotypically low-rent neighborhoods are now in fear of developers pushing them out of what? None other than their trailers!

The proof is the news article "Location, location: Developers snatch up trailer parks."

That's all we need...more cookie-cutter, conformist housing developments for cookie-cutter, conformist people to live in, and more displaced people needing affordable housing. Why do you think Toll Brothers is one of the best performing stocks in the country?

We better start donating to Habitat for Humanity now.

Oh...and remember, the government really cares about you...

Pope Urges Confession During Holy Week

Come on, O.J., you can do it...

I'd like to hear some other confessions too, from:

Ted Kennedy

Michael Jackson

Bill Clinton

Ray Nagin

Mark McGwire, Sammy Sosa, and their cronies

most of the members of the NBA

Kofi Annon

April 10, 2006

Officer Cited for Showing 'Brokeback'

Now this one's funny. They didn't want to show the movie due to the "graphic nature of the sexually explicit scenes." Wow! How ridiculous. wasn't (from what I hear) a movie about cowboys raping each other, but a movie about man-love. Creepy...sordid...extramarital man-love, but non-violent.

To have a prison get upset about that makes as much sense as letting homicidal maniacs pump weights and turn into raging musclebound homicidal maniacs...about as much sense as boxer shorts and mini candy bars. Nobody's getting raped here boys.

Of course, it could spark a round of unwelcome man-love amongst the lonely inmates, but that's supposed to happen or we wouldn't have our stereotypes and cliche's, now would we?

What we do at work...

China to establish reserve for rare white dolphin they can pen them all in, making them easier to kill and eat. This is similar to the bear-bile milking farms used for ancient medicines, the poachers employed to kill all the Rhino's in Africa; all the brown and black bears in the American Rockies, all the sharks in the sea, all the eels and menhaden in the northeast, exotic species from around the world including Mountain Gorillas; sardines and herring in California, and until 1994 when the net ban came, all the mullet in Florida.

Rhino know, the Chinese aren't "horny" enough.

...but at least a beer "huggie" only costs fifty cents...

April 9, 2006

Communistic ideas.

You know, sometimes I have Communistic ideas, and really, they're more like tendencies.

I hate the greedy, and the arrogant, and believe they should be taught lessons.

I applaud Hugo Chavez' cheap oil to poor people in our country program. He should keep it up and the greedy American oil companies and our government which supports them should be taught shame for making this necessary.

We would never do anything about the record oil company profits because we've let greed and arrogance get so in-grained into our culture that doing something to them would make the stock market plunge and hurt every other American company and citizen.

There will never be a cure for cancer in this country because there's no profit in it for the big, government supported greedy and arrogant drug companies. People say Cuba, yes Cuba, the little country everybody seems to flee because of how bad it sucks, is actually reported to have a national health care plan and competent doctors, a program which should come as an embarrassment to the big, greedy, drug and insurance company-run medical system we have here.

I hate insurance companies that threaten you into parting with all kinds of money for all kinds of coverage, and when the flood or natural disaster hits, or you get in an accident, they default (read: refuse to pay) on coverage they were bound to pay you by contract, and the government says "oh well," and does nothing. The insurance companies do what they want; they are above the law; their greedy corporate culture screws-over Americans left-and-right, and the government has no problem with that. The government would rather make sure the company stays afloat than honor its contractual obligations to pay. In other words, the government doesn't care if it does the right thing and shafting American citizens is fine with them.

Did we ever figure out what was in it for us when we invaded Iraq? Was it worth the huge deficit we have now? Did I authorize that? Did I say they could spend so much dough on a frivolous exercise in futility? Was it a benefit or a burden for all Americans to invade Iraq?

What other greedy, arrogant politicians will we elect next go-around. Guaranteed there'll be a Kennedy in there somewhere. You have to have mistress-drowning adulterers. It's a rule. And you have to bring all your cronies with you when you go to Washington so when all the skeletons start coming out of the closet, your supposed friends and advisors can jump off that rat ship you built. You know, the rat ship of sniveling, brown-nosing, wanna-be politician yes-men. Don't worry though, more crooked idiots are already waiting to pretend to be your friends.

It's called lobbyists, corruption, greed, and arrogance. This is the kind of thing the 2nd Amendment says we need guns from a tyrannical government. As you can see, it's starting to burn all the president's men, all the vice-president's flunkies, big-time corporate jerkoffs, congressmen, and a bunch of others. Their arrogance and greed gets in the way of doing the right thing for the rest of the country. Their country-club corporate power-politics makes them corrupt and lust for power and political favor. They can't see the real picture because of it, and they never will. They vote themselves millionaire retirement plans and pay raises, but forget about things like border security until it bites them. After the wound heals, they go right back to business-as-usual until it bites them again, and so-on, and so-on.

Poll: Immigration Worries Growing in U.S.

A couple thoughts come to mind dealing with the whole immigration issue:

-We are not a nation of immigrants. We are a nation of legal immigrants wanting to find a PC way to deal with the illegal ones.

-Illegal immigrants are aliens, not immigrants

-Stop all the benefits we give people for being here illegally and some may go home. How do these people get cars and get in accidents, kill people, and all that happens is they get sent home? That happened this week.

-If you really want to slap an American in the face, just tell him he has to take out a loan to send his kid to college while an illegal alien gets in for free.

-How do they think they'll enforce the new immigration idea? Answer: They're not, and they never intended to in the first place. It's a political trick. It's a lie.

-Why is immigration such a problem? It's just because of the tax revenue and the burden in health, social services, and schools these aliens put on the rest of us. however, everybody knows this is a problem that president after president gave lip-service to, and it snowballed into the problem it is today.

-Amnesty for anyone here before 1 January 06 is probably the only way to enforce this thing.

-Does this mean I'll hear English in the Walmart in Miami? No way!

-They may not like it, but when Vincente Fox said "Mexicans will do work that Blacks won't do," he was right. In fact, they'll do work that most Americans won't. Why is that? Because work is work to them. Having a job is a noble thing, and a way to provide for your family. Only in America do we arrogantly look down our noses and put people in working "classes."

-Like I said before...if the Mexican government doesn't want to stop all its citizens fleeing here, then they need to pay us in oil to keep letting them come.

-A guy running across the border makes a great target for sniper practice!

-Maybe we could pay the people coming up and crossing the border to test sneakers and hiking shoes! Then we could advertise "rugged enough to make the Baja 200- mile immigrant walk.

-Did Mexico run out of farm fields or something?

-When the Latin immigrants join gangs in California, we should be allowed to practice fire-and-maneuver tactics on them.

-Why can't they just do it the legal way? I mean really? Why not? Is there something that would stop them from coming? Do they just want to be illegal?

-Why isn't the Mexican government (and others in central and South America) just flat-out embarrassed that their countries suck so bad their people are clamoring to come here?

U.N.: Nations Refuse to Stop Geneocide

No they aren't. They don't know any better. It's age-old ethnic, religious, clan, tribal, and political warfare. It happens. The only problem is all the U.N. does is whine while they wait for the United States to do something about it.

They asked France and a couple other nations to do something about a number of these issues, and either it was a miserable failure or they said no. I believe it's also part of Darwinism. The strong survive, while the weak need to be tended-to by the masses and by outsiders. This is combined with developed nations saying "what's in it for me," and deciding if the case is worth getting involved.

I also think people now decide to stay out of things because in more and more cases, someone goes to some shitty country somewhere and ends-up getting killed for their trouble. It's like going to the neighbor's house when you stop the husband beating the crap out of the wife, and then in the irony of ironies, she pulls a gun and kills you for it. Crime statistics bear this out, proving that domestic violence calls are the most dangerous ones for police to respond.

The U.N. needs to ask themselves when they really need to get involved in nations that continually show they would not only rather have someone handle theior problems, but left to their own devices, they would rather be warring than at peace. Just look at Haiti. The U.N. intervenes in 1994 and then 2004, and is it any better than it was? Are Haitians still killing each other for power and money? Are gangs still roaming around doing the politician's dirty work? Has the poverty, AIDS, and environmental destruction stopped or even slowed? Have foreign investors come in or gone away? Does corruption rule or is there compassionate leadership? Has the infrastructure improved or further deteriorated?

I think it's time to tell the United Nations to sit down and shut-up. They're not effective and corruption reigns supreme there also. Until they go saying how screwed-up other places and other people are, they need to be above reproach or at least not seen as part of the problem.

By the way...the AP reporter on this story spelled "Genocide" wrong. Spell-check my lad, spell check...

U.S. Troops Kill 8 Suspected Insurgents

What is this, Washington D.C.? Do all these people have lawyers? I know, the ACLU has it's band of merry men over there handing out cards and teaching insurgents about the "US versus Miranda" court case, right?

WTF? Maybe they should call the article "Terrorist shit-heads get "benefit of the doubt." Or "American legal system a boon to the terrorist cause?"

Sure, sure, our legal system is okay, but it leans too heavily on the side of the criminal. "Suspected" insurgents. "Suspected" safehouse. What's with all the "suspected" nonsense? This isn't America we're fighting in, and we don't normally shoot people down who just look like insurgents. I would hazard to say that when one of these "suspected" insurgents fires an AK-47 at you, they're no longer "suspected" of anything. And what's with calling them "assailants?" Did they just rob a Walmart or something?

Hey news media! I have a solution; drop the touchy-feely PC bullshit and write normally. Here's an example:

"The U.S. military reports American troops killed eight insurgents Sunday during a raid north of Baghdad. Clashes erupted when troops surrounded a safehouse and nearby tent on the northern outskirts of the city. American forces killed five enemy insurgents inside the tent, and as enemy firing on them continued, our troops called for an air strike which claimed the other three bad guys."

Now is that so hard?