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Showing posts with label Cruise ship. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Cruise ship. Show all posts

August 14, 2018

HMS Titanic: The Do-Over: Hell No, I Won't Go!

https://citizen.co.za/news/news-world/1773878/titanic-ii-the-new-replica-ship-will-set-sail-in-2018/

At least two different organizations are building real, life-size, exact replicas of the original ship. One was Blue Star Lines, not to be confused with White Star Line. The other is a Chinese billionaire (an oxymoron and paradox in a so-called, yet surely for-show Communist country.). Yeah, China's as communist as Donald Trump's an Arab. It's called slave labor for those that supply the unwashed masses at Wal-Mart...but I digress. So I ask you, if the replica ship was going to re-do the original voyage, would you go? Not me, brother. No way, no how. Well, not unless I was trying to die. We never learn, do we. Talk about a Jinx. They should rename the boat the SS Jonah. It reeks of the stink eye, bad juju, voodoo, bad omen, a pox on passengers, the hairy eyeball, hex, whammy, malediction, distress, plague, doom, and agony to spare. No thanks. I can see it hitting another iceberg and then, magically, people would say "well, what did they expect" or "see, I told you so," and people would laugh at the way you perished more ironically than Patches O'Houlihan getting crushed by the "Luck of the Irish" sign in the Movie Dodgeball. Nah, I'd rather bet against the ship. What's next? 9/11 World Trade Center, The Ride at Universal Studios? Or "Ebola Outbreak; Death Village" in IMAX 3D? I could get worse, but I won't. Nevertheless, a ride on another Titanic? Not for me. Nope. Where once it was the Unsinkable Molly Brown, there will be the Unsinkable Brainclogger...

March 4, 2010

Wave hits cruise ship proving even the ocean hates the French!

"Louis" cruise lines? Really? Can we be more cliche? Why not Pierre Cruise Line or Jean Claude Cruises? Escargot Cruise Line? Hmm...1800 people piled into a big tin can eating goat cheese...no thanks.

This eliminates the possibility of "voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir" becoming the motto of the cruise line, unless you want people to "sleep with the fishes" in the Godfather sense of the phrase.

I can see Cloris Leachman in the movie History of the World Part 1 saying "death to King Loooeeeeeeee."

Sacrebleu! Translation? What the F---...