"America is the biggest terrorist in the world,"

said Maulana Mohammed Sadiq, a lawmaker in the Jamiat Ulema-e-Islam party that helped organize the protest. "America bombed innocent people inside their homes." Takes one to know one you freakin shit-eating towelhead!
I have an idea...go get a job! Maybe you should be more mad at your dentist, you hillbilly retard.

The article in Fox news basically describes how everyone in that area supports and harbor the Taliban and Al Qaeda. Now comes the smoke and mirrors as they try to get the attention off of themselves.

Funny how on one side of Pakistan they harbor terrorists and hate our guts, while on the other side we're saving their sorry asses after an earthquake...probably while they hate our guts there also.

No matter what we do, these backward-assed idiots will always hate us. Let's stop acting like we care... We need to stop helping stupid people...

Apparently you WILL go blind!

Apparently doctors proved there actually is a connection between men's "equipment" and their eyes. I don't believe, however, that it's the drugs that are at fault, but rather, men messing with nature.

First, impotence drugs are taken predominantly by men over 50, where your "operational capabilities" naturally begin to cease, in a corresponding fashion to female menopause (which should really be called "womanopause," but that's another issue). Then men introduce an artificial substance into their bodies designed to "pump new life into junior." If the age-old myth you hear people tell little kids "if you keep playing with it, you'll go blind" is true, then most men lose some virility just before they would naturally go blind from using their "stuff." Enter the drug that pushes them over the threshold, and boom...fate tempted...vision lost.

I think it comes down to choices. If you want to see Mr. Stiffy and need to take a pill to do it, then understand the trade-off is impaired vision because you really have reached the point of "playing with it too much." Or maybe the vision impairment is really a good side effect. After all, these men are kind-of "older," and the women are probably of corresponding age, so maybe the vision loss helps you to think you're seeing some young chick. Think positive.

Personally, I think most men would never need any impotence drugs if they just maintained both their health, and that of their mate as they got older. Face it, we all gain some weight, and we all age, but when the 100 pound girl you married becomes the 200 pound woman you're stuck with, don't blame yourself for not "catching wood!" No one would blame you for that. The American female "it's all about me" attitude only goes so far. She would probably try to convince you that her extra hundred pounds was your fault, and like the wussies most men are, probably take the blame. I know some self-centered, whining, pain-in-the-ass American chicks that would bring down the most virile 22 year-old. We've seen the commercials..."my man takes blah blah blah." If you stayed in shape, you would have the option to go out and find someone more appealing than that selfish beeyaatch....the ultimate revenge. Of course, if your chica is now older but still "smoking hot," then you're good to go.

Exercising also helps the sex drive, so armed with a lighter woman in better shape with a healthy sex drive, you would most likely be armed with the proper "gun," ready to go off.

I really don't think the "if you keep playing with it, you'll go blind" is actually true of those who just engage in natural "personal maintenance" activities. If so, I would have been as blind as Stevie Wonder 10-years ago. But hey, then I would've really gotten the chicks, because they would all look like Christie Brinkley! Wait a minute...Dad has macular degeneration. Whoa! I don't even want to think about that!

Hollywood pushes the gay agenda

So gay and transsexual themes dominated the Golden Globes, eh? Should they? Who is Hollywood making these movies for? Certainly not me.

As if anyone can't see Hollywood pushing their own agenda in who they give awards to, and what they promote. As if... Guess what...Americans really aren't that stupid. When the industry gives out awards to themselves, what else are they going to do but push their lifestyle on others, a lifestyle that's completely abnormal. Well, abnormal unless you like hanging out with liberals, engaging in alcoholism, drug addiction, homosexual copulation, subversion, anti-American activities, wife-swapping, spouse abusing, carrying around shitty little dogs, and wearing a path between the rehab center and the cosmetic surgeon. No thanks.

When we saw "Bareback Mountain" come out, we all said "yep, it'll probably win the Oscar, even if it bombs. Oh yeah, what I want to do on any given night is go spend an insane amount of money to go to a movie and watch a couple rump-wrangling sheep-herders who call themselves "cowboys." Since when did herding sheep make someone a cowboy? If I give myself some medicine, am I a doctor? Does opening a beer make me a bartender?

By the way...what's George Clooney still doing here? I thought he and Alec Baldwin said they were moving away when Bush got elected? Well, add lying to the list of things Hollywood people do.

I have the apology Pakistan demands right here...

It goes something like this:

-We're sorry your country sucks. I can't understand why with all those mountains, people don't come there to go skiing in the winter. Oh, I forgot, no ski slopes and too many towel-headed terrorists.
-We're sorry most of your people are uneducated, illiterate retards who blindly follow any idiot that promises a handful of rice and a sheep to fornicate, and are unfortunately too stupid to understand that every time you have a kid it's another mouth to feed.
-We're sorry your economy is non-existent and you have to burn goat shit for firewood
-We're sorry we spent millions of dollars helping you after the earthquake when it's plain to see you don't appreciate it. We promise to not do it again.

How's that?

Pakistanis (and others) have very short memories...

I think it is more and more evident every day...all the countries we help don't appreciate it. They bitch if we don't help, and they bitch if we do. We send people and aircraft and relief supplies by the ton...when we don't have to, and do they appreciate it? Hell no. So I think we should stop.

We give taxpayer money to the United Nations. It's like a pet store that sells you dead fish, then later on you find out they charged you double, and yet you still keep going there. Like paying for a beer but only getting an empty glass, going to a car wash that throws mud on your car, or buying a sandwich that makes you sick. We should stop our involvement with them as well. I have a better use for the money...we could go skydiving without parachutes and hope our parachutes will work. Well, that's kind of the same thing...like jabbing a knife in your chest and saying "at least I didn't get shot."

Same goes for Mexico, where Mexican smugglers kill our border agents while their president gets American lawyers to stop us from protecting ourselves. When do we get to shoot first?

We send more food to North Korea than any other country, but do we ever say so? We saved South Korea from being wiped off the face of the earth, and do they show their thanks? Hell no, they talk about standing up to the U.S., and protest against us every day. We did the same thing for France, and look how they act toward us. We saved Saudi Arabia from Saddam, and now look how they're squaring us away! (gag).

We let guilt give us a royal screwing and put our country in jeopardy as we watched sniveling President Carter give away the Panama Canal, all our military bases in Panama, all our military capabilities there...the whole damn thing. Good job there Einstein! Thanks for making it 100-times harder to protect our southern border.

What is so wrong in wanting someone to say thank you? All these poorer countries making us feel guilty for having a higher standard of living is a bunch of crap. Oops, there's AIDS in Africa? Then stop having unprotected sex, but don't try to make me feel bad about it like it's my problem...because it's not. Lots of poor blacks in New Orleans eh? How is that my problem, or the president's, or anyone else's other than the mayor, the governor, and those very people's problem? When you let people rely on government hand-outs, you create people who can't fend for themselves, or decide not to. Again, not my problem.

The Peruvian indians are having problems with birth defects, oh no! Let's throw money at them immediately! Or rather, let's not. Instead, we should help them understand what "inbreeding" means. We gotta help the Cubans! Or rather, we don't...until every last one of them that comes here stops trying to us all how great it was there. If it was so great, then why the hell did you leave? Did you bring the Buena Vista Social Club with you? No? Then go back and get them!

On the flip side, the problem in Haiti was created by the United States and its underhanded program of eradicating the Haitian pig back in the 30's. We should fix that. And we should leave the Hawaiians alone. They seem perfectly happy with the worst educational system in the U.S., so let them enjoy their ignorance...bruddah.

I think it's just the ignorance and lack of manners that irritates me the most...and the government spending my money ridiculously. Oh, and Senator's Reid, Kennedy, Schumer, Pelosi, and Clinton, people that call other people "dawg," and stop-lights, announcements in Wal-Mart in Spanish, horseflies, whiners, the "race card," Paris Hilton, "plastic-ware," using the public laundromat, people who are too stupid to flush a toilet but apparently smart enough to fly a military aircraft, Mexican food, family separation, the lack of diesel-powered cars, and...

Anti-gunners call for pellet-gun ban

After an 8th grader in Orlando Florida is shot by police while yielding a pellet gun that closely resembled a 9mm Beretta, members of the senate and proponents of gay cowboy movies called for a national ban on pellet guns, saying it would make it safer for children and Christmas movie watchers the world over. The "Brady bunch" went on to call for boycotts of any stores that sell pellet guns, or guns that look like pellet guns, or pellets that look like guns. Apparently even suppository dispensing devices weren't safe from their liberal wrath, much to the delight of gay groups who said they were tired of being held-up at anal-pellet gunpoint.

In another story, police went over to the house where the parents bought their kid a gun that looked like a real gun and further, that allowed him to take it to school...and slapped the piss out of them. Problem solved. Apparently, if he was forced to pump-up the gun ten-times before he pointed it at the cops, they would have known it wasn't an actual firearm...and not shot him.

When will people remember when the cops come, they're bringing an ass-kicking with them?

Toddler dies after head gets stuck in car window

Now here's a father that needs an ass-kicking.

Sharon fails to come out of coma

Did you ever hear the expression "hoping against hope?" The guy didn't have some little stroke blood clot in his head...he had a blood vessel blow out in his brain and he bled into his skull!!! Reporting that he didn't come out of the coma just makes me want to say "well no shit! What did you expect? Thought he would wake up and say he had to go to work?" He's an old man in obviously poor health who had a brain aneurysm, and people are surprised he's not recovering?

Well, it's a shame but it really is "hoping against hope." Anybody remember Terry Schiavo?

New flights begin at MIA...so what!

Sure, I can understand the flight to Salt Lake City...the tourist mecca that it is... (gag).

But you still can't get a flight to Atlantic City from Missing In Action (MIA), and have to go to Fort Lauderdale to catch one. Don't even ask about flights to the Bahamas...

Helsinki! Whew! Somebody stop me!

The problem with liberals (well, one of them anyway).

Now you see, Lionel Tate is an asshole punk kid who is headed for either a life sentence or an early grave. Everybody knows it, yet liberal lawyers are acting like they're oh-so worried about his supposed rights. Sure they are.

What these lawyers are really doing is everything they can in order to get some attention, because obviously they didn't get enough as kids. Are people really so concerned with the rights of criminals and miscreants? I don't think so. Why would anyone have such a fervor for defending scum that rob and assault people at gunpoint...people who are just trying to make a living and mind their own business?

The lesser burden of proof ''deprives him of all the rights a person should have when he faces life in prison,'' Rubin said this morning in Fort Lauderdale. Hey Einstein (yes, I'm aware of the double entendre), he was in the can for killing someone, and was supposed to keep his nose clean. Instead, he's been back to jail two times already. Dick...

When we start concentrating on the good people, maybe the bad will get the hint. It's like in the Army, where we spend 95% of our time dealing with 5% of our troops...the bad ones, while the rest suffer because of that. I've learned that hammering the bad makes the rest of the bad wise-up. Lionel Tate is a lost cause and needs to get hammered as an example to the other shitheads out there. He doesn't deserve any more attention than it takes to do that.

Let's move to Sarasota to get away from the "houseless!"

Enough of the mamby-pamby coddling of the "houseless," let's get real. No one wants some bum sleeping on your porch or in your car, so politically correct sympathy is a waste of time and makes people who "support" the homeless look like a bunch of spineless drones. Then the press asks the dude in charge of the Washington-based National Coalition for the Homeless what he thinks?.

Based where? Where did they find him? In Washington? Where in Washington? Is it under the bridge near the Lincoln Memorial? Third trash can from the back gate of the White House? The dumpster behind the National Archives? I don't think so. I wonder how much he gets paid...and where his money comes from? If people have enough dough for a "national coalition," which is another term for a lobbyist, then they have enough for a place to live. They do actually have offices, a web site, paid employees, and get money in a number of ways, including the Combined Federal Campaign which is a yearly donation drive from Department of Defense personnel, and by telemarketing (and we all know how much we love telemarketers).

So they call homeless people lying around drunk, messing up the place "camping," do they? We used to call it loitering or vagrancy, but I guess that was too unkind to the vagrant homeless? So what do we call actual camping? I can see it now...some father somewhere says "come on kids, we're going camping" ...and all the kids start crying."

Funny how we don't talk about where the houseless problem is the worst, just where people living indoors are the biggest bunch of "meanies." I bet if we did, someone would say the problem is because of racism, which is patronizing bullshit that just embarrasses all of us. Yep, it's that kind of thing that makes Americans look so freaking stupid.

Brainclogger

I have the solution for Mexican Immigration...

In the article, it says remittances from the U.S. (read: welfare from relatives) is the second largest source of foreign currency for Mexico...behind OIL EXPORTS!!!

Hey Washington! Did anybody see the same article?

So here's the solution: Pay us in oil. Yes, you heard it...pay us in oil.

Mexico and a bunch of other nations want migrants treated as welcome guests? Well I want to drive a really big car that gets really shitty gas mileage, so as long as we;re nice to people fleeing their country for ours, their country (with Mexico leading the way) can pay us in oil.

Too easy. They need the remittances, we need oil, so it's win-win as far as I can see... Hey, lots of cars are built in Mexico and sold here, so they would only be helping sell more cars, right?

Done deal. Now where's a greedy friggin oil man when you need one?

Cubans in Cuba and Mexicans in Mexico

I keep asking myself why Castro and Vincente Fox aren't concerned about their citizens risking their lives to beat-feet on out of there and over to the good old U.S. of A? What? One less mouth to feed? Like they were feeding them in the first place?

Fox really puzzles me more than Castro. I mean, we announce the possibility of building a wall to keep illegal immigrants out, and Fox gets a lawyer in Dallas to stop it, calling the move "anti-Mexican." Well no shit...ya think? It's not anti-Mexican. It's anti illegal Mexicans. "Hey, my citizens have the right to flee from here and go where you are! They have the right to work over there and send back to my country as much of your money as possible!"

Nit-wit.

Oh, but one thing Vincente Fox is right about is Mexicans will take jobs that blacks won't, and in the process of finding people eager to work, a Mexican will beat a black to the line every time. But that's another story.

I still wonder though, why people who flee their own country try to convince everyone how great it is back there, and don't want to be Americans? What's with the Cuban flag hanging from the rear-view mirror? Did you even have a car in Cuba?

Harry Belafonte is an asshole

He is just another in a long line of people who forget where they come from. No one in Venezuela would get away with talking about their president the way you did about your own. Dick...

You forget that don't you? You and your buddy Danny Glover slither over to a foreign country and embarrass yourselves by demonstrating how disloyal and spineless you both really are. Do you understand that Latins look at people who show no loyalty to their own like they are dogs? To people outside the U.S., you and Mr. Glover are just plain Americans, and have no shame and no character because you show no loyalty. I have an idea!!! While you're out of the country, why don't you both stay out!!! Morons...

How the hell did a Calypso-singing retard get to work for the United Nations in the first place? Oh, I forgot...never mind. He's just another one of the horde of retards over there...


If I was the president, I'd make a special trip out to Harry's house just to kick his ass. Danny Glover's too.

Mr Belafonte: Why would you go to Venezuela to coddle a dictator? I can guarantee Chavez thinks you're an asshole too. Unlike yourself, Chavez values loyalty.

Daylight come and me wanna Harry go home...

Brainclogger update

Still alive, and still in the Middle East. Back from R&R in the states for almost a month, and newly married! I got married to my oh-so-smoking-hot Spanish chica on 22 November, and so I've already been married for more than a month. We, along with my son, caught more redfish in the two weeks I was home in Naples than than any other time I can remember. She can really fish!

I'll be here until May, and trying to get back to Miami to live with my wife in her own town and in her own house, and so she can stay in her current job.

Brainclogger

The Obituary of Mr. Common Sense

Mr. Sense had been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm and that life isn't always fair. Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not kids, are in charge). His health began to rapidly deteriorate when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. Mr. Sense declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer aspirin to a student; but, could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an aboration. Finally, Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandents became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense finally gave up the ghost after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a bit in her lap, and was awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by two stepbrothers, My Rights and Ima Whiner. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. Author unknown.
Brainclogger

So I took a poll...

...in my section as to the pronunciation of the following words:

Imagination
Idiot
Ignorant
Illiterate
Iraq.

...and I still got the "eye-RACK" pronunciation. When I said it bothered me that a certain general officer pronounced it even worse than that, I heard "well, he's from the South."

Imagine my surprise... Not...

Brainclogger

The Ugly American speaks, and sounds like a dolt.

Every day I hear people pronounce the word Iraq as "eye-RACK" and it sends a chill up my spine every time. It's clearly nowhere near the proper pronunciation, and I hear it from everybody, all the way up to people wearing multiple stars! Eek!

I think sometimes it's because of American arrogance. Yep, we're an arrogant lot. An attitude fostered by years of warfare abroad, and a "do and say whatever you want" attitude back home. Americans routinely "piss in other people's Wheaties" with wreckless abandon, all the while thinking we have a right to. We think we have a right to everything, and would never entertain even the slightest notion that maybe we don't. This gives rise to what I call the "American apologist," which is a person who is fairly well-traveled (for Americans, it's anyone who has ever stepped off the rock and gone somewhere other than just Cancun for spring break), and does his part to reverse the negative attitudes held by people of other countries toward us.

Arrogance and decadence go together, you know. If either of them were of a lesser degree in the US, I say 9-11 wouldn't have happened. I also think people just don't care about showing respect to others. Our moral values are down the proverbial "crapper."

Take for instance whenever I tell someone I'm from South Jersey. Without fail, someone will say "oh, you're from Joy-zee?" I didn't use the common "Joe Piscopo" pronunciation, yet I get it given back to me every time. Little do people know how big of a "jer-koff" they sound like when "dissin" me. The irony is, some of these people are the most hillbilly, sister-marrying, shit-kicking, backward-ass redneck retards you've ever seen. A lesson in how I pronounce my state by some dipshit spitting "cope" in a bottle is really valuable to me...

So then here we are with "eye-RACK." Can we try to pronounce countries correctly BEFORE we invade? Can we send out some damn memo or something? Come on people, you watch TV? Every once in a while you hear an Arab say Iraq, which sounds like "E-rock" or "ear-rock" but in no way, shape, or form is it "eye-RACK!"

I know, we should be saying "Eye-magination, Eye-diot, Eye-maginary, Eye-legitimate, and possible Eye-gnorant." At the very least, we sound "Eye-literate." Well, what do expect from the home of the "nuke-ya-ler" weapon?

You see, the Ugly American has no concern for his mispronunciation. He thinks his way of speaking is correct, while others would say "well, he's a good-old boy so whadda-ya expect," or something in deference to his heritage and section of the country, all the while thinking he or she was simply uneducated. However, in other countries, and for those immigrants in our own country, they take our blatant mispronunciation of their homeland as an insult, and a sign of disrespect and arrogance from Americans. But then again, we don't give a shit, right?

Yep, no worries about our arrogance. Nope. No one will attack people on our own soil, or strap bombs to themselves, or send biological agents through the mail, or anything like that. How dare they show such arrogance....such contempt for us...the Ugly American.

Brainclogger

I smell a rat in the latest Bush poll!

Okay, I'm waving the bullshit flag. First, the poll was done by Ipsos, a self-proclaimed independent (British) polling agency, whose people are pissed at their prime minister. Then it wasn't done as a question of Mr. Bush's honesty, but rather, his performance.

So you take the sample of 1000 people from the lower 48 states. First problem is 1000 doesn't evenly divide by 48 (20.83) so now you have to round off, or get more samples from one state than another. After that, the article doesn't mention the survey called people at random, so the AP could have told the Ipsos people where to call in each state according to political affiliation. Then the pollers say it was weighted to "represent the population." Man, big bullshit flag on this one!

Then the poll says one in twenty people polled will show results that have an error of more than 3%. So out of 1000 people, 50 will have a number that is in error greater than 3%, but gives no percentage of how bad it can actually get. Hmmm. Check it out for yourself at
http://www.guardian.co.uk/worldlatest/story/0,1280,-5330098,00.html

Then you take the AP article, where they say "Most" Americans disapprove of the President's job. Then they tell you "most" means 57%. That's a bit of a stretch, I think. You take a poll that can be bullshit from the start, make the questions crap, like asking about Katrina (where the crap about his poor response was a democratic fabrication), then when you get 57%, use the word "most." That's pushing it a bit, even for the Associated Press.

Then they say "Poll: Most Americans Say Bush Not Honest." That wasn't what the poll asked. It asks about people's opinions about his performance, with a question about congress at the end. This is intentionally injurious to the president, and the AP should be ashamed (although they won't because they're all a bunch of liberal assclowns)

The president may not be doing a very good job at foreign policy, domestic policy, trade, fuel prices, or the deficit, but hey, the economy is actually doing well, and his wife is still smoking hot at 59! Nobody asked if he finally let cronyism and the good old boy thing, and his love for "big oil" bite him in the ass. That it did.

But what did any democrat do besides spread hate and discontent? Absolutely nothing. They stand for nothing except "whatever the opposite of what the republicans stand for." That's not a belief or plan. It's bullshit, so there's another flag! If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the problem.

Brainclogger

Fossils gettin "Freaky!"

Now the extinction really had to come fast for this to happen... see the link.

Men Kick Down Home's Door In Random Attack

Ten bucks says these guys were illegals. Yep, that immigration policy is really working, isn't it?

I also wonder how they knew a woman would be by herself in her house, she wouldn't have a gun, and she had a car they could get away in? It wasn't random.

The article also has odd use of the word "apparently," for example "She heard a loud noise and apparently someone kicked the front door in," Orlando police Sgt. Barbara Jones said."

Duh...

Brainclogger

Alleged 'Black Family Mafia' Group Arrested In Car Bust

My question is, who is the head of this family of not-so-smart gangsters? Maybe they would learn things like "don't use a car registered to you to transport cocaine," or maybe "people without jobs driving exotic cars attract attention to themselves." You know, little things like that. The vehicles were obviously smarter than the people driving them.

Leave the "mafia" type things to the Italians, okay? By the way...do you even know what a Kilo is?

I wonder why everything in this country is in standard measurements, except for drugs?

Brainclogger

Man Caught On Tape Sprinkling Fecal Matter On Pastries

Now this is the first whacky news item for today. The interesting part is the dude was arrested by the FBI, probably for suspected use of a "bacterial agent," but it turned out to be plain old poo. The disturbing part is, this guy was "copping a squat" right next to his own bed! Yuck!That makes about as much sense as the protestors in the Rodney King riots burning down their own houses! Did he sleep there too? What else is he sprinkling dried "dump" on? Is this the next form of extreme recycling? Did he get charged with improper disposal of hazardous waste? What else did he touch while he was in the store? Wash that apple!!! Was it the act of a lone, stool-slinging "gunman," or did this rectal ranger have an alementary accomplice? Get CSI in there ASAP!

Of course, at least this guy had a hobby, and this will teach parents to let their kids have a cookie in the store! Okay moms, make the cookies at home from now on.

Of course, someone will probably sue the store over this, and it will go out of business due to legal fees, and in the end, only the lawyers will benefit...

Brainclogger

Bush Picks Alito for Supreme Court

Senator Harry Reid, in another demonstration of delusion combined with absolutely enormous balls, said the following in response to the president's actions today:

"The Senate needs to find out if the man replacing Miers is too radical for the American people," said Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid, D-Nevada.

Wow. What's more, he said it with a straight face. Lightening didn't strike, thunder didn't clap, and a swarm of locusts didn't descend on D.C. (The president would have had to take the blame for any of that if it happened) He didn't even appear to have his fingers crossed behind his back.

But I wonder if somewhere else in the building, the rest of the evil coven (Pelosi, Gephardt, Clinton, Schumer, Kennedy, Feinstein, Boxer, Kerry, Byrd, et al) were in their robes, chanting incatations and making an offering to Beelzebub, Mephistopheles, Barbara Streisand, or whatever other liberal god they pray to?

Brainclogger

I thought it already ended?

PARIS - Famed French actor Gerard Depardieu' says in a newspaper interview that he's ending his film career and swears he wasn't drunk when he said it.

Maybe he should have been? Then slapped a woman, kicked a dog, stripped naked, climbed the Eiffel Tower, and then checked into rehab. That would revive his career like it does for American actors.

Cheer up Froggy, life's not so bad. Oh, I forgot you're French.

So what does it take to be "famed" in France, anyway?

Brainclogger

Comets Hit Early Americans, Scientist Says

I think it was aliens. Or maybe global warming...all sudden-like, and localized. Maybe flaming bovine flatulence, or even that whacky H.G. Wells and his time machine?

Of course, whatever the cause, President Bush will probably get the blame...or maybe the "white devil," even though were was no such thing as a "white person" 15000 years ago.

The president will probably take the wrap for that one too... I know! Blame it on FEMA!

Brainclogger

Don't Quit Karl!!!

I don't care if you're guilty or not. Really, I don't. If those hypocrites are going to suggest you resign when their poster child President Clinton cheated on his wife with a young tart in "our house," then lied about it on TV to the entire world, and they didn't suggest the same for that one...bugger them, don't do it! In fact, blame it on them like they do to you...

Maybe you can quibble and snivel like Clinton did, with the "it depends on what the definition of the word 'is' is" nonsense. He should get an ass-kicking just for pulling that faggoty stunt! Now the woman that put up with that kind of nonsense wants to be president? Whatever.

Who listens to Senator Reid anyway, the hateful democrat that he is? He never, ever has anything positive to say, and his entire belief system is based on "the complete opposite of whatever they believe in." That's no way to live.

At least Karl Rove shows some "sack" by demonstrating loyalty and devotion to someone, unlike these democrats and their "we believe in nothing," agenda. Do they get up in the morning looking forward to being unproductive, uncooperative, clueless, and uninspiring? A little less pampering would do them some good.

Don't quit Mr. Rove.

Brainclogger

One thing Rosa couldn't survive...

She lived for many years and survived countless things including Hurricane Katrina, but one thing she couldn't survive was the hypocritical political correctness of Washington D.C.

Brainclogger

Birds verses Windmills

Now this is typical tree-hugger bullshit. Either people want alternative forms of energy or they don't. These same people who want to protect the birds by shutting down the windmills, will probably drive over and protest the power plant that has to pick up the slack for the lost windmill power.

It's all that "we say we want it to be PC, but we don't really want it," double-talk bullshit that makes me want to kill someone. What comes first, people or birds? Why can't you scare the birds away? Are they too stupid to see a giant whirling propeller? What's next? After this, the powerplant is making the air the birds fly in dirty? The fields around the power turbines have too much goose poo and it's mean to the ducks? The birds of prey feel singled-out for being carnivores and protested by the vegetarian tree huggers? Will the birds get lawyers?

If we shoot some of the birds, will others commit suicide in protest? Maybe they'll fly away and not go into the spinning windmills? We chase birds away from airports, right? Maybe we can play some Celine Deion! That's it! Her music can repel anything!

I know! Replace the windmills with a nice little nuclear power plant! They're fun for the whole family! Put an oil refinery on the other part of the property, and buy the land next door, strip off all the trees, then make it an open-pit mine. When the environmentalists want the windmills back again, we can strap antlers on their heads and hunt them like deer.

Like I said, we either want clean energy, or we don't. I know, I shouldn't expect for a Californian to make up their mind... Ooh, burn...

Brainclogger

Seen American Beauty one too many times?

In the movie, there was the misunderstood kid, who was a bit whacky, a bit dark, but just wanted to be able to deal with his nutcase of a father. It was the father that turned out to be the killer after he decided to kiss the neighbor and was rebuked by him for not being gay. Oops!

This looks like another misunderstood kid. He played the guitar, so he had talent, and used a mask, which is fairly creative. He kills the girl across the street. Hmmm. Are you thinking what I'm thinking? He sat on the porch and saw her involved with other guys, in the form of them picking her up, or whatever? Carried a torch for her. How did he expect for people not to know it was him?

A paintball mask? Strange game. A sado-masochistic metaphor for armed lethal combat, armed mayhem without the requisite bloodshed, and you have beers with the enemy after. Well now, it didn't work out like that this time. Not surprising. The cape is a nice touch though. Now if he was naked except for the mask and cape, painted black with his ass painted red, wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom, a batman utility belt, and big fuzzy slippers, running around yelling "it puts the lotion in the basket," now that would be unique. And probably get him out of jail...

People shouldn't be surprised. Violence comes to the burbs. Just hope Micheal Moore doesn't get his fat ass involved.

Parents, hide the ammo.

Brainclogger

Okay, so that explains it...

Okay, so George Takei coming out of the "closet" finally explains this picture. You know, I can take this in a number of directions (as I'm sure George can), for instance:

caption: Robert Conrad going "beep, beep, beep."
caption: You don't look like a Black Sheep there Bobby.
caption: Do you like my "helmet."
caption: Damn, why does every episode have a prostate exam scene?
caption: Pilot to co-pilot, we're going down in flames!

But I don't want to do that. Mr. Takei is an extremely accomplished man, who has a resume' a mile long, including all the Star Treks, appearing in the Green Beret's (a cheesy movie, but you have to dig John Wayne), Miami Vice, Mulan; he's received awards for social causes from the emperor of Japan and a bunch of democrats, and has probably accomplished more in his life than I ever will...except by being a soldier, I guarantee his right to do what he wants, live where he lives, and say what he wants to say. Plus, I've always liked the Asian chicks... (I had to say that, sorry. Come on, you know you like them too!)

What's more, he's been with the same person for 18 years, which is twice the record I was able to make with my ex, showing even gays have better records than I do when it come to the fidelity and loyalty of their partners! Creepy, but true. Oh well.

The only thing I disagree with is, even though Mr. Takei shows lots of guts by putting his "coming out" on the front page of his website, I really don't want to hear about his, or anybody else's (gay or straight) sexual preference. Keep it to yourself. Here's a news flash...the rest of the people in the country aren't like people in Hollywood, or even in California for that matter. What may have seemed like a monumentous thing to you and something celebrated by people in Hollywood, the rest of America could really give a shit. Sorry, but that's the truth. If you're a normal person, my troopers and I will have a soda with you. If you're gay, so what, we don't need a big proclamation. If you choose to march or scream about it, I choose to dislike you, use terms like "fag, rump-ranger, colon cowboy, etc, and make you feel like you're deviant and discriminated against. Maybe it's my South Jersey upbringing, I don't know.

Just act normally and all will be well...

Brainclogger

In the words of Happy Gilmore

"All you need for golf are goofy clothes and a fat ass! My next door neighbor must be a great golfer...huge ass!"

The news says the golf craze is slowing down. Well, why should people go crazy and worry? Americans (who have unrealistic expectations in the first place) get stupid when something considered a "boom" starts to slow down. They somehow think the latest "boom" over golf is indicative of something. Here's your answer:

Their right, it is indicative of something, but it has nothing to do with golf. Here's the truth...sorry if it hurts you golfer-weirdo's out there: The only reason for golf courses is to build and sell the real estate around them. Period.

Americans, in their hunt for bling, have to be able to look down their noses at someone and say they live on a golf course. It's something Americans have to do, since an ego is one of our traits, and concentration on stuff that isn't important to anyone else but us, like material crap. Then they pull the oldest (nerd) trick in the book, which is take someone golfing, play down the course on their street, then try to act surprised as they exclaim to their guest "wow, I can see my house from the course!" Well of course you can, dipshit, it's 50 feet off the course and you've played that hole a hundred times... Now your guest thinks you're a real jerk too. Nice going.

It's not hard, the interest rates have started to go back up, and the amount of available housing around golf courses has decreased. It's a no-brainer. Besides, after the big attempt to attract John-Q Public to play golf, and seeing as many pairs of cut-off jeans and wife-beaters on the course, people get a bit tired of that kind of thing. The reason for the bandana hanging out of the back pocket is what again? Como? Come to find out, those high-top sneakers and all the Marlboro butts actually are bad for the course.

The hard reality of it is, unless you can afford the real estate, most of the golf courses around nowadays are private, so you're looking at forking-over some dough to play. The public courses are expensive too, and usually chewed-up by all the other golfers and neglected by the owners who put more money into the bar and restaurant than the course. People get tired of having the wife constantly tell them to bring the kids to the pitch-and-putt irons course (so she can go cheat on you for the afternoon), and once they get fairly good at the game, are tired of all the hackers and beer-golfers who screw-up the course and then make nine-holes take three hours.

Hey, it's a great game for senior citizens and corporate types, but if you're a guy who wants to hang with the kids, or do something where the scenery changes and you don't have to look at old women in plaid, try something else. Did you know fishing is the number-one sport in the country, twice as popular as NASCAR, pro sports, and yes, even golf. Why? Because it's not the game that's important, but the people you spend time with while you do them. Write that down.

Take up golf when you're knees finally give out, or you give really want to shine the boss's ass. Chances are he's got a big ass.

Never trust someone who doesn't fish.

Brainclogger

More proof we're all crazy...Dead Celebrity watch!

We're so concerned with the truly unimportant, that we actually track the money earned by dead celebrities. What's worse is, I'm alive, and they still made more than me. Aside from that, someone is sitting back fat and happy, profiting off the earnings of a dead celebrity. Now there's the definition of completely worthless. I'd like to know where the money is going, for I could really give a shit about who made what.

Of course, what's even more sad, is a national money magazine like Forbes is reporting this crap. Oh, and doing so right next to more articles about big, gas-guzzling pig SUV's. When will Americans finally concentrate on the truly important things in life? When will we realize that we can't scorch the earth, suck up all the resources, scream "more more, gimme gimme" all the time, and finally give a damn about each other and our environment. When will the meaningless, the greed, the apathy, and the hate go away?

Our society is in its downfall. We've gotten so fat and lazy we've sealed our fate. Greed and hate has replaced caring and sharing. National or even community spirit has been replaced by "what's in it for me," and the feeling of "I'm looking out for number one." Well I ask you, what have all these people done to think they deserve such selfishness? We've segregated ourselves into subcultures with our own interests, looking to the government for special treatment, instead of everyone wanting to contribute to the bigger team. Yes, we segregate ourselves. We tear our country apart from the inside, while other countries laugh at us, and say we deserve it.

They may be right.

Brainclogger

My opinion on Harriet Miers

Stupid decision, the president shouldn't have picked her, he needs to dump her. The good-old-boy house of cards is starting to fall, and even though I'm a conservative, I don't care. I don't care about the democrats either, or the congress in total.

Remember all that crap about "I'm a uniter, not a divider?" Still believe any of it? By the way, "uniter" isn't a word.

Brainclogger

Wilma response...

So it's been what? Three days? Unbelievable how people are blaming the governor for a slow response. Actually, thinking about it...a democratic state, a republican governor whose brother is the president. Skip that "unbelievable part."

Go ahead and bitch all you want. Does anyone (besides me) understand the sheer magnitude of bringing over 6 million people three days worth of supply of food, water, and ice? Everybody sitting around waiting for someone to help them can just sit and wait some more.

American's are INCREDIBLY UNREALISTIC, and far too self-involved. Reason?

• When you're not part of the process and tell the government to get away all the time, then a hurricane comes and you EXPECT the government to help you.
• When it's the first day after the storm that you need gas, baby food, medicine, and ice. Are you kidding me? What's worse is you're desperate enough to pay $20 a gallon. Look in the visor mirror to see an idiot.
• When you expect for a never-ending supply of disaster aid with no interruption. When they invent the Star Trek transporter to replace the tractor-trailer, then maybe... There's also the loading the trucks, getting the supplies to load, producing the supplies, etc.
• When it's the first day after the storm and you realize you need some cash, or a Big Mac is the thing to get. Here's some advice: Get it in Jacksonville.
• When you decide you would rather sit and bitch about it being the "third world" rather than getting in the car or on the train and leaving until the power comes back on.

I am so tired of American civilians whining like the sniveling sissies they are. Stand on your own two feet, stop yelling "we want it and we want it now," and realize things don't happen instantly, trucks leaving Tallahassee don't get to Miami in an hour, and suck it up. You chose to live in Florida, now live with that decision. The governor's not to blame, but guess who is?

You. You're to blame. Go see if your neighbors are okay. Clean something. Clean something of the neighbors. Have some room temperature water, it won't kill you, you pampered (CENSORED). Stop doing the "gimme, gimme, gimme" routine. Some of us are tired of seeing supposedly "free" Americans doing that shit. What did you ever do to deserve so much. What did you do to deserve anything? When do we tell welfare recipients enough is enough? When do we stop the bullshit Cuban policy that pays them when they get here? What's with all the handouts? We've turned everyone into trained pets, only responding when you give them something, with no motivation of their own, and who use their free-will to complain their handouts aren't satisfactory. That's friggin sad.

By the way, the democrat lackey mayor in Miami can shut his trap too... People elected you because they wanted a cop, not a politician. Stop trying to be one.

Brainclogger

I was a believer once...

I'm not really sure when it was, most likely as I served two years in Korea, since I was going to mass every weekend, finding the church a place where I felt good. Oddly, every time I went to mass, there was a point somewhere in there that I was led to tears. I wonder why?

Nowadays, I find no interest in any of that. I came back from Korea only to see the priest sex abuse scandal, and back into the reality of my failed marriage and son who lives with the ex as I struggle to see him from 4 hours away. I then have to see his reaction to all the men she lets come and go, and realize that while I kept the moral high ground through the divorce and everything that followed, I lost, and in the end the moral high ground wasn't worth it. It's like how I am biologically unable to kiss ass, yet the ass-kissers get ahead, regardless of what people say.

Then I look around for signs of God. Suffering children, wars, "ethnic cleansing" (which is just a PC phrase for mass murder of people who aren't like you), hatred and murder in the name of God, Allah, and whomever else; women killing their children; men kidnapping, molesting, and murdering little kids; my son continuing to be subjected to that whore; my brother disrespecting and dishonoring my parents; good people dying while evil people live; killer storms, killer earthquakes, killer floods, corruption, vice, greed, more people killing in the name of God; Aids, Bird Flu, etc. etc.

Through all this, where is God? I miss almost every birthday, first day of school, soccer games, karate practices, colds, sleepless nights, scraped knees, and holidays of a child who is only 11, and what do I get in return? Paying through the nose and no contact with him while I'm in the desert, which I'm sure is her doing since she has yet another boyfriend. Do I even look forward to going back home and being nearby? No. I'm in the Army, so I go where they order, and where is home anyway? Even my number one girl, whom I consider one of the only shining spots in my life, the person who always said she was worried I would break her heart, apparently had no issue with breaking mine as I found out she was lying to me about something for two years.

All around me I hear people talking about their faith, and I think, their "blind faith." Maybe I had that kind of hope when I was their age? Probably not. After growing up with my abusive brother, seeing a good friend die when I was 17, and feeling lost at 18, I really don't think hope was in my bag of tricks. If I'm to believe most of what I see and little of what I hear, then I don't believe in God. I see some people who seem to really enjoy their faith. I was born Catholic, so I don't have such an experience. Instead, I can still see the looks of sheer guilt and anguish on the old people in church, and the voice of the priest as he hit us up for cash. All the while, people of other faiths try to tell me how messed-up my church is, never knowing I don't consider it mine. Priests told me growing up to fear God, fear God, God will punish you, and then one day it was "love him because he loves you." Well, welcome to Dysfunction Junction. When I asked why that was, a priest said it was what they told kids to keep them in line. I told him that was pretty freakin stupid. Apparently, God thinks kids are idiots.

It seems that while some people live carefree lives where everything seems to fall in place, my mission is apparently to atone for whatever sin I've committed now, every day, and to suffer through the mind-numbing contact I'm forced to have with my ex in the "hope" of some spoonful of contact with my son. I'm stuck. If I want more constant contact, I have to sacrifice my job and my pension in order to locate myself nearby, but if I don't make myself suffer that way, I sacrifice being there for his pre-teen and teenage years. I already missed his childhood.

Thanks God. You'll tell me what I did to deserve this, okay? Oh, I forget, you NEVER answer, but apparently expect people to believe just "because." And you think we're idiots? You're right, we are. The reason they should believe is the old "because the Bible says so," and when someone asks why, everyone else tells them how bad they are for questioning God (when they're actually questioning a book), guilting them into submission. (It's the five monkeys story of an earlier blog entry) Let me know what my son did also. Of course, you let him get baptised by that pedophile priest, but I guess that was okay, right?

Wrong. If he existed, would he really allow so many children to suffer? If so, he's one sick bastard, and I don't want anything to do with him. And what exactly did my parents do that makes them deserve to have to suffer through my idiot brother's mistreatment? What did my cousin do when you made him suffer from age 9 to age 27 when he died, only to make sure his family had to be there for every gut-wrenching detail? You have a sick sense of humor.

Of course, believers are also indoctrinated in the "you can't say anything bad to God or you're bad." Well, fuck you people too... Blind faith is blind trust, something I just can't bring myself to do. I see far too many people who don't go to church, who seem to skate though life with no problems. I know people who use the expression "It's part of God's plan," which I find moronic, combined with the fact we're not supposed to question the "plan," because that's questioning God, who is apparently infallable.

Right. Show me one more little kid with a bloated stomach from starving or born with AIDS, and I'll show you a fallable God. Show me one more innocent person minding their business getting blown-up by a terrorist and I'll show you a fallable God. Show me a son, and his father, who cry because they miss each other over and over again, while his mother complains about how hard she has it being around him all the time, and I'll show you a fallable God. No. You feed the kids, you end the AIDS, you stop the terrorists, and you stop making it so damn hard for me to be around my kid. Don't let others make excuses for you. Do it.

Come to think of it, he sounds like a democrat.

Like I said, I used to be a believer. Now I believe I'll stop talking about it.

Brainclogger

somebody bitch-slap that beeyaatch!!!

Day after day, and time and time again, the Iranians demonstrate they had no say-so in their elections because who would elect such a hateful knucklehead? Besides either harboring secret desires to appear on the reunion episode of Miami Vice, or not yet having the testosterone to grow an actual beard, the scrawny, scruffy Iranian leader continues to use the press as his tool to call for more murder and mayhem.

Hateful and ugly. He's probably so upset because he's never been laid...

Tell him to go take a shower and try to be a little more positive. I'm just waiting for his mother to show up and JAP-slap him like the angry little demon he is!

No big surprise where islamic youth learn to hate everybody...

Brainclogger

Mom always said to change your underwear...

Only the Brits would put out an article like this, and do it with a straight face! Anti-microbial underwear? Well, I think technology has just exceeded common sense. Wash your underwear and your ass!

They say these things are designed for people who are "laundry challenged," "trekkers," and backpackers. Yeah...right! These are for the Starbucks-generation, slacker college kids that wear their clothes for multiple days. Admit it, you know you want to...

So it works with special bits of silver sewn into the material? How about making a breath mint out of that stuff, or a t-shirt with that in the underarms (armpit is such a trashy word)? How about car seats, or a pair of pants? I think the picture in the article suggests a little more than they intended...or are they trying to tell us something? Hey, everybody knows a woman who can wear a pair of underwear for a week and you wouldn't know, so what gives?

But you're supposed to change those underwear, just like Mom says! You never know when you'll be in an accident! They should really call it exchange, not change. After all, you want to exchange a dirty pair for a clean one, right?

Brainclogger

Pretend it's the Ex!!! With a meat lesson...

Dan seems like an interesting guy, for a college kid. That's why I check out his antics on planetdan.net every once in a while, and where I found the link. Actually, he seems like a normal college kid like thousands of others like him...and myself a while back.

Yep, before I lost my mind, signed-up for the "permanent program" with a college chick I should have dumped like the slut she really is. She was rag'd-out back then, and when Mom didn't approve, I should have known better. My mistake, the error has been corrected. Actually, it corrected itself once all her insecurities and ego-centrism resurfaced in all it's many, ugly forms. This is one reason why the link is so funny to me...

But times do change. The new "Broad of Brainclogger" not only has the Department of Agriculture Seal (USDA-Prime), but has the Mom and Dad seal of approval, which is better.

In case you think I'm being a sexist, USDA Prime is a good thing! The best thing.

"USDA Prime: Prime grade beef is the ultimate in tenderness, juiciness, and flavor. It has abundant marbling -- flecks of fat within the lean -- which enhances both flavor and juiciness"

Prime isn't the best because it's the leanest...it's not supposed to be. "It has the perfect mixture, and is therefore the best tasting." We don't want the leanest, we want the tastiest. It's just like with women. Don't just take my word for it...trust the USDA!

You see, my current girl is really all-female, where the ex is quite manly. The ex isn't even a "Select" cut. Constantly obsessed not with a feminine body, but a "hard" body, where once she may have looked athletic, now she just looks like a sun-bleached, leather-faced, frizzed-hair, white trash trailer slut, with no feminine features besides the fact she can get into a bikini. Yuck. How do you convey shuddering on a blog? :(

Where meats are concerned, she is USDA-Cannery, a disturbing grade; the bottom rung, used for pet foods, and unfortunately, ground beef, and in "manufactured meats" like frankfurters. This is why Kosher franks are better, since they have Choice-grade meats in them, e.g. Sabretts, Hebrew National, etc. No snout, guts or asshole ever makes it into one of those. Does this make the ex literally a "piece of ass?" Now that's funny! She spends so much time and energy on selecting a great deal of a different kind of meat, she should know this stuff by heart. What's the grade for vein-laden meat-pipe? What about Tube-steak? Man-meat? Sau-zeech?

"Each USDA beef quality grade is a measure of a distinct level of quality -- and it takes eight grades to span the range. They are USDA Prime, Choice, Select, Standard, Commercial, Utility, Cutter, and Canner." There's a long way between Prime and Cannery...in meat, and in women.

"USDA Prime, Choice, Select, and Standard grades come from younger beef. The highest grade, USDA Prime, is used mostly by hotels and restaurants, but a small amount is sold at retail markets. The grade most widely sold at retail is USDA Choice. However, consumer preference for leaner beef has increased the popularity of the Select grade of beef. Select grade can now be found at most meat counters.

Standard and Commercial grade beef frequently is sold as ungraded or as "brand name" meat.
The three lower grades -- USDA Utility, Cutter, and Canner -- are seldom, if ever, sold at retail but are used instead to make ground beef and manufactured meat items such as frankfurters. For the ex, the grade has to be "in the Canner."

I wonder what level of quality goes into "Potted Meat Food Product?" What exactly is "partially defatted beef fatty tissue?" I also wonder who the girl in the link is modeled after? She reminds me of the ex, except this woman is obviously far more limber than she ever was, and blessed with the inability to speak. Now that would be nice. This is also the other reason why the link is funny.

Yes, I'm bitter, so what! I hate that whore, and really dig my real chica. If you don't like it, I have some Prime Loin for you...

Brainclogger...

The empty seat next to me

I sit looking at the empty seat next to me. It's a perfectly good seat, yet no one wants to sit there. Actually, no one dares sit there. I think they would keep others from doing so as well. It's a nice chair, really. Black, high-top, nice and clean... It's nicer than most of the other chairs. But it's empty.

The walk around it, and the workstation it sits near. People look at it, and for some reason, avoid even touching it. I even look at it and find my mind wandering.

It was Sam's chair. He was in it before he left.

We can still see him. He was the second youngest of my people. Others thought of him as much older, but for those that got to know him, we knew how young he really was.

None of us knew he wouldn't come back... You can still see the shock in people's faces.

Without Sam, is it still Sam's chair? Why can't anyone else sit there? Why can't anyone bring themselves to sit there? Grief not addressed and reality not faced. He was a kid, but he was also a man. He was supposed to be away from the danger, but it came to him.

Did the rest not "earn" the right to sit there? Did Sam earn the right to his own chair? Did he do it by the things he did while he was here, or what happened to him when he left? Is it respect, or guilt, or fear that keeps the chair empty?

Does anyone earn anything by getting killed? Our hearts are as empty as Sam's chair.

Brainclogger

Mr. Johnson Thanks You!

I've been thinking about why men wash their hands after they pee...

Shouldn't it be BEFORE you pee? I mean, unless you're doing something I'm not, your hands (rather than your unit) touch everything, get dirty, wipe your face and nose, touch other people, touch your desk, computer, workout equipment, the ground, and basically get dirty, while Mr. Johnson stays as clean in your underwear as he was when you put him there after your shower this morning. Don't tell me you don't shower in the morning... Are you the same person who never cleans his coffee cup? Would you wash your car with a dirty rag? Fold your clothes with dirty hands? Swim in a dirty pool?

So why is it men go into the bathroom with a pair of dirty hands and touch their clean (you know what) with them? Trying to poison the One-eyed Monster? Need greasy hands to get a grip on the trouser snake? What's the deal? I've seen people workout at the gym, go outside and do pushups in the dirt, then sit-ups where they touch the backs of their heads, then run, sweat, wipe their faces with their hands, their nose with their arm, and then go use the bathroom, only to wash their hands AFTER they touch their personal "equipment." If you do this and you're a girl...you're even more nasty.

I don't understand washing afterward. If it's a sit-down appointment, I completely agree, but if you're only going "number one," why are you still getting pee on your hands? Personally, I stopped getting any on me years ago. You know, the handles on the sink are probably holding more germs than the old "heat-seeking moisture missile." This reminds me...if you're doing some "inshore drilling," (throwing the ruby-headed love-dart, Russel, the love-muscle) wash those hands before any of that! The two dirtiest parts of your body are your hands, and ironically, your mouth.

...and you thought it was somewhere else...

Brainclogger

ACLU Christmas Tree like a Chinese Finger Trap

You know, every time I hear about those idiot lawyers at the ACLU, it makes my head hurt.

Why are they called the "civil" liberties union? The preponderance of Americans want to put up Christmas trees, string some lights, sing songs (or at least listen to them), and celebrate the Christmas season (yes, the Christmas season) by actually demonstrating good will towards their fellow man, and hope for peace on earth. They are also anything but civil, as they infringe on all our rights for the sake of a few misguided and maladjusted cretins...

But No! Not you bastards at the ACLU! Anyone having the right to celebrate a Christian holiday is the enemy to you pagan fucks, so you go to the ends of the earth to make sure you ruin it for everyone and turn them into the same lifeless, joyless, hopeless, dickless morons you are! We don't want to be you. We like Americans, and we hate lawyers! Why won't you just go away?

It's not Festivus. It's not Chrisma-Hanu-Kwanzuka, nor is it Yoma-Hanu-Kwansmas.

Take your lawyer- communist-freedom-hater blinders off and realize that we left Europe and established this country to get AWAY from assholes like you. Be gone!!! Piss off!!!

So find an ACLU lawyer, tie him to a liberal, ram a Christmas tree where the sun don't shine, then plug the lights in. Then try to remove it quickly. Yep, just like a Chinese finger trap! Like a six-foot evergreen anal lawn dart! You never know...they may even like it, the sick freaks!

Brainclogger

Buy that Man a Lawn Mower!

There was an article in today's herald (see link) about a Mexican that's been fighting to live in this country for years, and has been deported (on our nickel) and re-entered the country more than just a handful of times.

While I applaud this guy's efforts to come here and work (Lord knows we have plenty of lazy-bastard Americans that sit on their asses instead of working), it makes it blatantly clear our immigration laws and border security efforts simply aren't working.

Hey! Maybe next time, he should just claim he's Cuban. Then he'll get citizenship and a check, instead of a ride to Krome Avenue.

I wonder if that lawnmower comment will piss anyone off?

Brainclogger

We should give them hats and spurs...

When you think about it, Baghdad is the modern-day version of Tombstone, Dodge City, or better yet...Deadwood. Welcome to the wild west! Us city slickers in our fancy machinery roll through town and people naturally go "who do them there fellers think they is?" So they shoot at us, bomb us, and generally try to hurt us, while at the same time acting like our friends and asking/begging for our help.

Then the locals kill other locals and segregate themselves into gangs and neighborhoods; everyone is afraid of the guy who really owns the town and his evil minions; the sheriff is a pussy, the town marshall is on the take; the deputies play both sides of the fence; they're all in-bred and related to each other; some of the "God-fearing" folk are the same ones who own whorehouses and bars; your friend at the old watering hole during the day is out bushwhacking you at night(including insurgents who act as police, and Iraqi military people who sell them weapons); they steal your horses (in the form of fuel, food, and supplies), cheat at all their games (like war, contracting, driving, ambushes, allegiances), and live like pigs, but try to tell you how screwed-up you are. They might be greedy for things in their version of an afterlife, but they're still greedy like everyone else.

Why don't we just give all of them six-shooters and black 10-gallon hats, then invite them out to a deul at high noon?

...then we cluster bomb and mini-gun the shit out of them and stomp on any big chunks left over...

Brainclogger...

That fella's a food group!

In a recent news story, confirming not only their relationship, but the fact that throughout out this nation's history Hollywood people are weirdo's, Jennifer Anniston refers to Vince Vaughn as "delicious."

Now that's just creepy...

Brainclogger

The idiots from the 60's.

Let me be a bit more clear on this comment...

I consider the following people and/or groups from the 60's "idiots."

• The Kennedy's. One gets a free pass after letting a girl he was cheating on his wife with drown in his car...and now, he's a fat senator with "pull." Then his brother and sister-in-law, with all this "Camelot" nonsense, thinking there's such a thing as American royalty. Wait a minute Mr. President...you wouldn't be the same guy whose daddy got him elected, would you? The daddy that made his money as a bootlegger? Oh, and he wouldn't have been there if not for the mob, so consorting with the underworld may not be the best example of how to do things...or maybe it is? Then the nepotism that put his younger brother in the attorney general's job, only to backfire and probably get both of them killed for screwing with the mob. Sirhan Sirhan... Horse shit...Horse shit...
• People against civil rights. A prime example of the American bullshit attitude of "I'm better than you." What makes some backward-ass, inbred, horn-rimmed birthcontrol glasses-wearing, flat-top haircut having whitebread knucklehead think he's better than a black farmer just minding his business? The whole "I hate you, and you, and you too" thing just pisses me off. Anybody that uses a firehose or "sicks" a dog on you just because you want to have the same rights they have is an ass.
• People with the "black power" slave mentality. They were advocating violence, while telling everyone how the white devil "owed" them. That attitude still exists, and until we get over it, race relations will never get ironed out. People in general are unwilling to understand that the only "race" is the human race, and that color is only skin deep, but being an idiot goes all the way to the bone. But then again, we have a slave mentality in this country that led to things like a mass concentration of helpless people in New Orleans, which was blamed on George Bush, demonstrating the other mentality, the one of "blame someone else" and a lack of self-reliance. Damn the man!
• Flower children. The whole "live and let-live" thing was a lot of crap. It was an excuse to sit around, take drugs, do nothing but become a burden on someone else, have lots of sex, play music, and... well, actually, that sounds pretty good. Skip that. It's like living the life of a perpetual high-schooler. Next time I have the opportunity to go live the sex, drugs, and rock-and-roll life instead of coming to the middle east and defending everyone else's rights, I'll do that instead.
• Women's Libbers. Guess what...a bra is used to keep things in place so they don't stretch-out and give you something else to complain about. I'm sorry you can't be guys, but hey, I can't be a girl, so I guess we're even. The only thing you liberated yourselves from was your senses. Oh, that, and the traditional view of nurturing your children. Yep, your fragile ego led to your kids being a bunch of worthless fucks. I hope that job was worth it. Happy now? Now you can be upset no one wants to have sex with you.
• The "space race." It was a race with no finish line, no real competition (it wasn't like the Russians were using their own designs for space rockets), and no point. Sputnik was a glorified garage door opener. Oh, and the timing of when we landed on the moon (the end of 1968, the most tragic year in our history)? A bit too ironic for me. Truth is...we never landed on the moon... Nope, never. Capricorn One was a documentary...
• The Johnsons.- Now there was an egotistical puke, and a good old Texas bubba like GW, with some ironic similarities. Both oil guys, and both big business good-old-boys. Johnson cashed-in bigtime thru dealings with Brown and Root, and these many years later, the former president of the parent company for KBR is our Vice President. We went full bore into Vietnam just like Iraq (after they rubbed-out JFK, who was against that), and a few people got very, very rich. Now KBR is making a killing in the middle east. (What the Bush's are pocketing is unknown, but when I see a Saudi prince at the ranch in Crawford, I wonder, but Johnson benefitted personally). Aside from that, everything in the Johnson family held the initials LBJ. Everything. Johnson also hamstrung the military while protecting Ho Chi Minh, which extended the war and got a lot of troopers killed. Nice military record, ya puke (he was "appointed" a Lieutenant Commander in the Naval reserve, instead of working his way to that rank)! He was an observer in a plane that turned-tail and ran in the face of the enemy, and for his gallantry, he received the Silver Star.

Democrat or Republican, it doesn't matter. Graft, corruption, greed, vice...they're all guilty. Lining their pockets at the expense of the rest of us...but I digress.

There are more things, but it's time for lunch. Wow, does this make me look like a right-winger or what! Only on Mondays...

I'm actually not this hateful, but sometimes venting is fun...

Brainclogger

I think they heard me!!!

If you click on the title of the entry before this about the white boy march, the title of the article has been changed...

Interesting...

Same article, same pictures, different title...

White supremacist Riot in Toledo, Ohio

Waving the bullshit flag!

Read my last entry, then think of the irony... Then read all the news articles related to the white idiots marching in Ohio. I had to wave the bullshit flag! Guess what...none of the supposed "white supremacist's" were rioting. Nope. None of them. The rioters were black. Once the rioting got going, the marchers aparently went home...but the riots continued.

Oops! Did I say that out loud? Oh, I forget, due to political correctness beyond my control, it's no longer advisable to tell the truth. Yes, we may offend someone, or we may just look like we want to be honest, and you know we can't have that...

Newsflash!!! The Redneck White Boys, no matter how ridiculous they may be, have the right to their opinion, and just because it differs from everyone else's PC opinion, they don't always have to be labeled a "hate group." The people against the march have the right to their opinions too, but when they turn to violence and the press blames it on someone else, that's some bullshit.

Another Newsflash!!! The news media is trying to pander to the PC culture. Scroll down a few more entries to the one about the AP being a bunch of hacks. Well, here they go again. The headline in the Reuters article said "Ohio Neo-Nazi March Sparks Violence, Arrests." But if you look in both articles, they don't point the finger like they did when the New Orleans cops beat-up that guy. Nope, in that article, they said "Mr. Davis, who is black, ..." and then went on to say the cops were white. This time, they went with an angle that can only be called a lie.

This time, when violence is perpetrated by blacks, it is apparently still too politically incorrect to say that. The AP actually blamed the socialist group for doing the rioting, which is an out-and-out lie...not true...false...incorrect. A white man's bar got damaged by black rioters, but the news said nothing. Next thing you know, the press will get a new name for the apple (so you can't call an apple an apple, if you missed that one).

The media is trying to manipulate people's attitudes, thoughts, and their very minds by pandering to the politically correct and justifying the lies they spew to you. They're evil, they're liberal, and their worse than those dipshit white supremacist marchers. At least they go stand in the light of day and tell you what they believe in.

How Ironic...and sad

It's funny that in light of today's events, concerned with nothing else than all things that polarize our people and lead to nothing but hate and discontent; if I do a search for my blog on any one of a number of search engines, the one that consistently comes up is the one called "My Racial Moment...Sorry."

What is that one? 45 out of about 82? Why that one? Is that the only one considered sexy and derisive enough to link? Is it because that one has been quoted and linked by other boggers?

I think it's because our country continues to concentrate on the wrong thing.

Our country will destroy itself from within in the next 50 years... Melodramatic? Yes, but considering the course the idiots from the 60's put us on, it doesn't seem a short enough time frame.

Brainclogger.

Poll: Civility Taking a Beating in America

Well no shit! If this hasn't been blatantly obvious lately, then we've all been in comas. Start with the government, our "supposed" leadership. They act like spoiled children (probably because they're all lawyers...yuck!) , speak ill of each other, lie, cheat, steal, and get away with it. They're uncivil to each other like their lives depend on it, and it makes me want to puke! These are the same people who get their asses kissed like they're some kind of royalty? I wouldn't let most of them use my bathroom.

Then look at parents these days. "My kid can beat up your kid," and all their sports bullshit metaphors like "you gotta step-up," whatever that means. People who grew up in the "live and let live" 60's, 70's, and even the 80's are parents now and they let their kids say and do whatever they want, following their lead...of course. Let's all be friends, then when your kid mouths off to an adult, you can just sit there like the castrated, powerless lump of crap you are.

I've been witness to an unholy host of bad-mouthed, poorly educated, idiots who demonstrate their utter incivility and rudeness and pass it on to their kids with wreckless abandon. I know! Let's all go get some Budweiser's and some cigarettes, then go get a tattoo, a body piercing, and then we can all cut our hair into mullets, then make everything out of denim...shorts, skirts, pants, shirts, baby clothes. My ex is turning into that. She already has the old car she races on Saturdays with the rednecks, bleaches her hair three shades of white, and if she poked-out as many times as she's been poked-in, she'd be a porcupine.

Look at our society as a whole. It's a greed-driven, have versus the have-not, you're worthy if you have money and a low-life if you don't, speak too loud and I'll sue, damn the man, I'm better than you, throw the race card, keep up with the Jones' load of bullshit. Americans care about money...and little else. And I'm over here defending their right to lead these worthless lives

Then look at the trends. There is nothing written down anywhere that says when you go into a coffee house you're suddenly someone unique and are therefore required to act like a pompous asshole. Coffee houses have been around as long as coffee, so hold the nutmeg sprinkles there kid and shut the fuck up. Your snotty look deserves a bitch slap like the little punk you are. And honey, when you're standing in the airplane aisle back to front with everyone else, waiting to get off, that cell call you're on is definitely not a private call, so you too can clamp your sewer closed.
It's just as bad here in the Middle East in the service. Officers of the same rank walk around here with their chests out (women included) and act like it's their job to not say hello or be civil. They must be too important to say hello to you, or too busy to be friendly to you. I just chalk it up to being too ignorant and anti-social to demonstrate intelligence by showing good manners to me. At least they're sure of their lack of personality...as are the rest of us.

Let's just put it this way...Good manners are a sign of intelligence (caveat: there are lots of intelligent assclowns), and poor manners are a demonstration of stupidity. Right now, our country is looking pretty stupid.

Brainclogger

A letter from a friend of the Roosevelt's

Dear Friends:

Many years ago in Seattle, two wonderful neighbors, Elliott and Patty Roosevelt came to my home to swim on a regular basis. They were a great couple full of laughter and stories that today I continue to marvel at. Both are now deceased, but their stories remain. During the years of our friendship we had many, many discussions about his parents (President Franklin D. and Eleanor Roosevelt) and how his father and mother never intended for the Social Security and Welfare programs to turn out the way they are today. Elliott used to say that if his mother returned to earth and saw what the politicians had done to their programs she would have burned all of them in hell.

Here is a story I received today regarding the Social Security Program and I immediately thought of Elliott's comments. Hope you will read this and think about it. Margaret

Franklin Roosevelt, a Democrat, introduced the Social Security (FICA) Program. He promised:

1.) That participation in the Program would be completely voluntary,

2.) That the participants would only have to pay 1% of the first $1,400 of their annual incomes into the Program,

3.) That the money the participants elected to put into the Program would be deductible from their income for tax purposes each year,

4.) That the money the participants put into the independent "Trust Fund" rather than into the General operating fund, and therefore, would only be used to fund the Social Security Retirement Program, and no other Government program, and,

5.) That the annuity payments to the retirees would never be taxed as income.

Since many of us have paid into FICA for years and are now receiving a Social Security check every month -- and then finding that we are getting taxed on 85% of the money we paid to the Federal government to "put away," you may be interested in the following:

Q: Which Political Party took Social Security from the independent "Trust" fund and put it into the General fund so that Congress could spend it?

A: It was Lyndon Johnson and the democratically controlled House and Senate.

Q: Which Political Party eliminated the income tax deduction for Social Security (FICA) withholding?

A: The Democratic Party.

Q: Which Political Party started taxing Social Security annuities?

A: The Democratic Party, with Al Gore casting the "tie-breaking" deciding vote as President of the Senate, while he was Vice President of the U.S.

AND MY FAVORITE:

Q: Which Political Party decided to start giving annuity payments to immigrants?

A: That's right! Jimmy Carter and the Democratic Party. Immigrants moved into this country, and at age 65, began to receive Social Security payments! The Democratic Party gave these payments to them, even though they never paid a dime into it!

Then, after doing all this lying and thieving and violation of the original contract (FICA), the Democrats turn around and tell you that the Republicans want to take your Social Security away! And the worst part about it is, uninformed citizens believe it!

Brainclogger

Living in my own head...

Sitting here in the midst of a ridiculously irritating day, with staff officers running around like crazy people, I put on some Journey over the headphones as I sat at my laptop. It's funny how music can bring you back to times you loved, where everything was easy, and there was so much promise for you. I went back to when I was 16. It was summer time in Sea Isle City, New Jersey. The Jersey Shore, the greatest place in the world.

I can see everything like I'm living it again. My best friend Dave and I going to the surf shop in his beat-up Toyota Corolla, my feet out the window, crossed on top of the rear-view mirror. I remember throwing mini-pretzels out the window seeing if I can get them into the open windows of cars parked along the street. We didn't worry about what we were to become. We didn't worry about anything. We just lived... Journey was on the radio then too...

I remember long surfing sessions, followed by grilling Dietz and Watson hot dogs on the grill on my front deck overlooking the beach. I can see four of us in our wetsuits, stuffed into the outside shower trying to warm-up after surfing for five hours. I can see the day Dave met his wife, both of them looking so young. To me, they still haven’t changed. I can watch my friend Tom at his back-deck birthday party, he and his brother Frank, Dave, Jimmy, Tim, Andy, and Al looking just like any surfer you'd see in California.

I remember five of us, with two bikes and a skateboard, making our way uptown to the boardwalk arcade. I can hear Journey playing at the Spectrum in Philadelphia the first time I saw them. I can hear "Faithfully," and see the people standing, arm in arm, swaying to the music and singing. It was great. We were immortal at that moment. It's a moment caught in time that will never return, except in my mind, and in my heart. Those that are gone now are still there. I see them. Good thing army majors don't cry.

It's funny how things change. Who knew that party was two months before Tommy would be killed in a car accident, and after the funeral, we would never see Al again. Jaye joined him a year later, followed by John when I was in my twenties. Jimmy moved to California, Frank to Hawaii, for all intents and purposes, I left when I was 18. Dave's still there, so is Andy, but his grandmother, who treated me as one of her own, is gone, and his house was torn down. So was Andy’s. Others break contact out of misunderstandings or things others told them, like my old friend Joey. Then there comes a time in life where you have to put childish things down, and not speak of them again.

I see them now every couple years, but Dave and I still have a weird radar where he can tell when I come to town. I miss those guys, and those times. Times before the reality of 25 more years came. Marriages, divorces, kids, brothers you don’t speak to, it's all part of life. So are the people...all in their own way I guess. Some of them moved away; some found other friends and other lives; some died. But some are still there at the shore. They're our anchors. They keep the history and the memories in place for the rest of us.

We owe them...

Brainclogger...

The Associated Press is a bunch of Hacks!!!

Look at the earlier entry about the guy that got his ass whooped in New Orleans. These AP retards are purposely trying to stir up trouble. Look at the article. The majority of it is a copy of the older article, with some new stuff just pasted in. What's the matter? News reporter too unimaginative to write her own story?

Okay, we get it...the guy was black. Okay, we get it, the cops were white. I hear you, you don't need to say it again. I still don't think the blood was streaming down his arm and into the gutter...but you said it again.

These AP reporters probably watch the news on TV and then write the articles third-hand, then the editors just cut-and-paste from article to article due to an EXTREME lack of creativity. This way they can stretch them out and make people think they're producing more news when they're actually producing a whole lot of jack-shit!

Yes, I could do it better.

Brainclogger

Pulmonary Hypertension

Pulmonary Hypertension...also known as hyperventilating. I just realized I do this about once every week. Once a week when I'm trying to get my son on the phone, realizing I'm going to have to speak to the ex.

Take for example this week. I call on the house line, and the phone "magically" hangs-up after three rings. I call back on the same line, only to have it ring 10 times. I call her cell phone, and what happens? I have to hear her bullshit answer message where first she still uses my last name (which is like kicking me in the crotch with a steel boot), but then she utters the ridiculous phrase "your call is very important to me." Man I hate that!

So I leave a message...what the hell else am I going to do. As I hang up, I realize I've sucked in all the air around me, my chest is fully expanded, and yet I feel like I didn't get enough of a breath! So I keep trying, and my chest keeps tightening, and I think about how I used to think my ex was keeping my son from talking to me, but now I know! and I keep trying to get a full breath, but I already have one, but I'm not satisfied, so I'm sitting bolt-upright trying to pull my chest in so I can feel my lungs are fully expanded. Then comes the headache. Nice. Now that my chest muscles and rib cage are fully expanded, I can count on this feeling for another couple hours.

I've been to Iraq in a mortar attack and I barely raised my heartbeat. 85 jumps and this never happened. The only other time was when I was in an officer school and my son was about a week from being born. Now it happens simply because the anxiety I feel knowing I have to speak to that lousy whore ex-wife of mine is of such a level as to cause a physical response.

That sucks... I wonder how important my call would be if I stopped the 865 dollar checks?

Brainclogger

Police charged in beating in New Orleans

Now that's a damn shame. No, not that they beat someone up, but that cops are no longer able to throw someone a beating in order to keep the peace, or to subdue someone obviously resisting. In the words of Chris Rock, "If the police have to come get you, they're bringing an ass-kicking with them." Well, apparently not any more. They're not allowed... That's a shame, because sometimes dishing out some pain keeps everyone else who sees it in line. Send those officers to sensitivity training!

What may be worse here, is the author of the article is being clearly melodramatic. What's the matter Honey, not used to violence? she described the man as having "blood streaming down his arm and into the gutter." I don't think it was, but it sounds good.

Then a news photographer from got a poke in the gut and was yelled at. Horrifying! To think, he was yelled at...wow! Talk about violence! What's next? Maybe he'll stand in the corner for a "time out?" But I guess that's too harsh also...

Then I see the following paragraph, which astonished me in its level of bullshit: "Davis, who is black, was subdued at the intersection of Conti and Bourbon streets. Three of the officers appeared to be white, and the other is light skinned. The officer who hit Matthews is white. Defillo (the police spokesman) said race was not an issue."

Are you shitting me Mary? Of course race is an issue, because you just made it one! The sad thing is, people wouldn't be so pissed off about this if they weren't further inflamed by assholes like you! Why is the skin color of a police officer important when it's taking FOUR OF THEM to make an arrest on ONE BLACK MAN? If the man didn't resist, he wouldn't be subdued. If Rodney King didn't race through town at 125 miles-per-hour and then resist arrest, he wouldn't have had four cops with their adrenal glands on full-blast pissed-off at him! Arrrghhh! Liberals like you make me crazy.

They say the New Orleans police have a history of brutality and corruption? Let me just ask a wild question. What do you think the percentage of white officers is in the New Orleans police department? I bet you it's less than a third. Funny thing though, if the cops were black, we probably wouldn't have even seen the report, because it wouldn't exist.

Oh, and as for feeling bad for the cops living on a cruise ship and working 5 12-hour days... I live in the desert, and work 6 14-hour days, followed by a 10-hour day on the seventh day. Poor little police have to work long hours. Please. At least you're home and have a new Cadillac.

Brainclogger

You know what sucks???

...when you are deployed to the Middle East, and you are worrying about back home. You worry about here, about home, they worry about your being here, about what's going on there, etc. But at home, no one is carrying a gun around them besides the police. No one is talking about Explosive Formed Projectiles, Vehicle-borne Improved Explosive Devices, or that type of thing.

I know somewhere out there, someone hears "go out there and kick some ass, we'll be fine at home," or concentrate on what you have to do so you don't screw it up," or some other kind of motivation from home, but that's not what the people around me are getting. They hear whining and bitching from girlfriends how hard they have it teaching kindergarten, how tough their "weekend" was (I forgot what a weekend was a while ago), how they have to take care of the kids, how stressful it is in grad school, or how rough their work-week was, etc. Some of it borders on ridiculous considering our present location and situation. Why so many Americans need so much emotional support is also ridiculous. Are we overly-praised, overly pampered, and narcissistic? Probably.

Part of me understands what happens, especially if there is a leader in the family that's away. Another part of me, however, considers it an ego thing. Women (and generals) are by and large overly concerned about themselves, regardless of their awareness of that fact. Take for example, my ex wife. She is apparently taking this opportunity to make sure I have almost no contact with my son, who lives with her. What does that do? Puts mental stress on me. She is guilty of having to be praised at every moment of the day or else she risks feeling unappreciated, and non-validated. She apparently has another new boyfriend (I should say another new temporary boyfriend) who hasn't tired of her bullshit or poor sexual performance yet. It looks like she's taking the time to involve my son in that relationship so that she can make herself feel good about herself somehow, so contact with me is something she sees as a bother or something my son doesn't need. If I stopped the child support, she'd suddenly get real interested in contacting me. But enough about me.

I have soldiers with parents and grandparents in the hospital, wives having children, one kid in the hospital, one guy in the middle of a divorce when he left, and they spend as much time worrying about that as they do what they're mission is over here. Problem is, they have that luxury, since none of them are carrying guns through the streets of Baghdad, but taking their eye off the ball can interrupt support to those carrying guns in the streets, and that's a bad thing.

Did you ever get the feeling...

...that you worked for some complete morons? I mean, there are a lot of smart people around me, but then again, there are also some complete retards, who need to be eliminated before they either 1. get someone killed, or even worse, 2. Breed.

Now I understand the job may be a bit unusual, and that it carries with it a sense of duty, and a feeling you're protecting others' rights, be it true or not. What I don't get though, are the people who say "I do this job because it's fun." Those are the assholes I worry about, like they're saying that to convince themselves everything is fine and they shouldn't go suck on a gun barrel... What lives do these retards lead on the outside anyway? Usually, the "hey I love it here" guys are the same ones who work 14 hour days back in the states doing nothing other than breathing the air in their office in the mistaken belief that nothing can wait until tomorrow. I know their wives and kids don't think that! Losers... Go home! What the fuck is keeping you here all damn night? Go collect those military models on your own time! Guess what? Your family might want to go to the beach this weekend instead of watching you go reenact the battle of Vicksburg! Dork!

I wonder about the mere function of the inner workings of some of their noggins. Some of them act like they're perpetually "stuck on stupid," yet their ass-kissing skills seem to be honed to a razor's edge. It's Weird.

I hear an old song in my head sometimes. The first few verses go "You're kind of stuck where you are, but in your dreams you can buy expensive cars, live on Mars, and have it your way. You hate your boss at your job, but in your dreams, you can blow his head off, in your dreams you show no mercy." I hear this song when I get frustrated at the incredibly stupid questions I get asked at work sometimes...from apparently experienced military "professionals." I hear it when I realize we're doing something the hard way just because "that's the way it's always been done." I also get nuts when I see how grown men try to act like "Mr. Tough Guy" around here, instead of dropping the testosterone-laden horse-shit and just being civil. I've seen senior people just flat act the fool, like no matter who they were, they could say whatever they wanted to whomever they pleased. If they said to me what I've seen them say to other people, they would have gotten a "who the fuck do you think you're talking to" from me. Having rank is one thing, but just being an ass is another. Some people with zero people skills and partially functioning personalities are successful in the Army, and it makes me insane!

Good thing is, I know this, I have the self awareness to realize all this is not important, and I should just concentrate on the mission. Sometimes though, I can't believe how big of jerkoffs some of these people are!

In the end, it's not how many years you donated to the man. It's the people you met and the person you smiled at this morning, the one you offered a cup of coffee to, or the one you held the door for. A wise man once told me, "work for the Army, but live in the real world, because if you marry the army (like so many people do), one day you'll wake up and realize you married a whore that was just using you.

Kind of like my ex...

Brainclogger.

India Quake Survivors Complain of Slow Aid

India Quake Survivors Complain of Slow Aid...Blame George Bush. Hours later, President Bush emerged into the Rose Garden and proceeded to take the blame for it, just like the blame he took for the relief effort for Hurricane Katrina.

Of course, taking the blame for Katrina is about as ridiculous as doing it for the Indian Earthquake. However, MARK MY WORDS, the democrats will figure out how to use the Indian Earthquakes against him.

The next thing you know, President Bush will be accused of being the "second Gunman" on the grassy knoll, and admit to it, democrats will plant a muddy shovel on Air Force One, assert Jesse Jackson's claim that he broke the levee in New Orleans on purpose, and he'll admit to that, saying he worked alone and no one saw him leave Crawford in his pickup truck. Then the President will admit that Al Gore invented the internet, he killed Webster Hubble, and he paid Monica Lewinsky to take a shot from Slick Willy because Paula Jones cost him a lot of money and proved to be useless...

The president's advisors are so snake-bit and suspect right now they'd advise him to take the blame for Chappaquiddick, a crack-whore's case of the crabs, birdshit on the windshield, beach erosion, snow, darkness after sunset, red traffic lights, Apollo 1 and 13, lottery losers, the Challenger, Elvis' death, John Kerry's hairstyle, beer-farts, and the common cold...

Brainclogger