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2010-02-22

Get me a rolled-up newspaper!

Politicians aren't listening again. It seems Willy Wonka is their most cherished philosopher..."a little nonsense now and then is cherished by the wisest men." Only problem is the nonsense is nonstop.

Little children get a mild-mannered, unnaturally high pitched "no no no." Older kids get a stern talking to, a spank on the butt, a time-out, stand in the corner, the rack, a taste of soap, or whatever appropriate measure. (I bet the rack startled you). Don't obey the speed limit, get a ticket. Run a toll booth, get a ticket. Don't pay your bills...say goodbye to your credit, pay more in fees, have the house taken away, or go to jail. Hear "yes" when a woman says "no," and it's straight to the pokey with you. If you have a dog that keeps peeing on the floor, a rolled-up newspaper gets their attention. If you're an uppity horse you get the "switch," a device that clamps down on their lower lip and low-and-behold, instant compliance.

Soldiers get sent on rucksack marches, sailors stand extra watches, Marines sweat it out on the "quarterdeck," and zoomies in the Air Force have their golf game cut to only nine holes. It's about consequences and paying a penalty for not listening.

Politicians on the other hand, publicly brag about receiving bribes (Mary Landreu), getting special favors and payola (Nelson), have their PAC's and rich families pay their way into office (Pelosi, Kerry, Patrick Kennedy), put communists and former terrorists on their staff and swear up and down they'll cut-out every earmark and pork project while doing the exact opposite (Obama), give away American property, endanger our sovereignty, leave entire nations in ruins and yet still receive praise (Carter), receive sexual favors and start a new line of "special" cigars and remain in office (Clinton), trade her dignity for a political position (another Clinton), bitch about the environment while being the biggest polluter and energy user in the known universe (Gore), and now, they concentrate on what they consider necessary for political advantage in DIRECT CONTRADICTION TO THE NEEDS AND DESIRES OF THE PEOPLE. Like Thomas Jefferson said, "democracy is sometimes where 51% of the people deny the rights of the other 49."

A poll came out recently asking if those that currently govern have the consent of those governed, and the results were horrible. It's clear that partisan cronyism is more important than the needs of the people. What was it Mr. Spock said? "The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, or the one?" Politicians should watch more Star Trek and less American Idol.

Can I borrow Teddy Roosevelt's "big stick" for a moment? Hand me the switch...these bastards just aren't hearing me. It seems the beltway is like a force field shielding politicians from seeing what's going on beyond it's boundary. It's no use for them to go home either since they return to their "compounds" and other such isolated places.

Hand me that jug of Gatorade! Like a reversal of what happens at the end of a game, we'll throw the icy beverage over the losers in government! If any of them ever came to my house, they'll get the garden hose. I'd use a rolled-up newspaper, but seeing how most of the papers are liberal rags, the politicians would probably enjoy it. Maybe I'll use the Onion.

How about a rolled-up copy of the Constitution?

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